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To Share The Millions

Jerry has not been as fortunate as I for he has never been selected, while over recent years, my name has come up numerous times. At first I ignored these million dollar offers and news of unclaimed fortunes to which, with sterling clarity, I was noted to be the beneficiary. Repeatedly, I was said to be the next of kin to an astounding number of persons who have either been killed in grievous plane crash or by some other wretched accident. Finally, I am convinced. Many of my relatives–formerly unknown to me–have in an inopportune way died in foreign countries, and I, the next of kin, am set to inherit multiple fortunes.

The latest notification of another fortune came this morning, and with unexceeded rapidity of movement, I tapped out my acceptance of the proposal. Made a couple of minor changes in the details, particularly as regards the handling of the cash, but I am certain I will be able to cut this deal, and such a slight alteration should in no way hinder the consummation of such a striking business transaction.

It’s early in the morning as I write this–still pitch dark in Lake Havasu–and as I worked through these business dealings, a spirit of compassion swept into this motor home and flooded my already soft heart, and it came to me that I should share the news of my good fortune with you. Given the generous nature with which I am endowed, I have concluded that I should not only share the story of these fortunes I am about to inherit, but that I should give much of the money to you, the readers of my blog!

I want to hear from any of you who need (or just want) money. You altruist ones will probably plan to build church buildings, or set up foundations for the needy, or trust funds for widows and orphans. Some of you may admit to needing a new toy–a boat or motorcycle or a practical Rhino. Some may be looking for seed money to start the business you’ve always longed to establish. One of you may dream of spending a year cruising on the QE II. (I might be persuaded to join you. Just tell me when you’re leaving.) Whatever it is, let me know and I will make the decision about who receives the money, and in what amounts. Don’t worry about asking for too much, for I believe I am on a roll, and scores of millions of dollars are about to be mine–maybe billions.

Wanting to allay any skepticism that might try to wedge into your fine brains, I have included here the exact notification I received this morning, and one from a previous time. I’ve also set out my excellent, timely and brilliant response.

This one I received earlier:

DEAR FRIEND,

I KNOW THAT THIS MESSAGE WILL COME TO YOU AS A SURPRISE. I AM THE BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER IN BANK OF AFRICA (BOA), OUAGADOUGOU BURKINA FASO. I HOPED THAT YOU WILL NOT EXPOSE OR BETRAY THIS TRUST AND CONFIDENT THAT I AM ABOUT TO REPOSE ON YOU FOR THE MUTUAL BENEFIT OF OUR FAMILIES.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm
I NEED YOUR URGENT ASSISTANCE IN TRANSFERRING THE SUM OF (USD$25) MILLION TO YOUR ACCOUNT WITHIN 10 TO 14 BANKING DAYS. THIS MONEY HAS BEEN DORMANT FOR YEARS IN OUR BANK WITHOUT CLAIM. I WANT THE BANK TO RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEAREST PERSON TO OUR DECEASED CUSTOMER (THE OWNER OF THE ACCOUNT) DIED ALONG WITH HIS SUPPOSED NEXT OF KIN IN AN AIR CRASH SINCE JULY, 2000.
I DON’T WANT THE MONEY TO GO INTO OUR BANK TREASURER ACCOUNT AS AN ABANDONED FUND. SO THIS IS THE REASON WHY I CONTACTED YOU SO THAT THE BANK CAN RELEASE THE MONEY TO YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE DECEASED CUSTOMER. PLEASE I WOULD LIKE YOU TO KEEP THIS PROPOSAL AS A TOP SECRET AND DELETE IT IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED.
UPON RECEIPT OF YOUR REPLY, I WILL GIVE YOU FULL DETAILS ON HOW THE BUSINESS WILL BE EXECUTED AND ALSO NOTE THAT YOU WILL HAVE 30% OF THE ABOVE MENTIONED SUM IF YOU AGREE TO HANDLE THIS BUSINESS WITH ME? AND 10% WILL BE SET ASIDE FOR ANY EXPENSES THAT WARRANT ON THE PROCESS BEFORE THE FUND GET INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT SUCH AS TELEPHONE CALLS BILLS (ETC).

BEST REGARD.
MR YUSUF MUSA.

And this is the one that popped onto my screen this morning, along with my response.

Esteemed Fellow,

This is wishing you a wonderful day.

My name is MR. song, director of Foreign operations of (Hong
Kong’s)bigest banks I want to seek your candid collaboration in handling a business venture that I feel it would be of mutual benefit to you and I.

May I ask your permission to present you as a Beneficiary to this fund, worth over seventy Million,The Previous Audit reports shows that the fund has been there for the past five years.unclaimed. I am offering you this opportunity, believing that you will be capable of keeping the fund in safe custody when it hits your bank account, and you Will
hand over my share of 70% on demand and keep 30% to yourself .

if you are willing to make this deal with me, contact me with this my secured email: songya@sify.com

Yours Truly,

Mr. Song Ya.

Mr. Song Ya:

Perhaps you have forgotten, but when you contacted me before, I said,
yes, I wanted to be involved in the money deal. Just bring the cash by
my house. On the spot I will peel off your share of 70% and keep the
30% myself. If you’re not here in the US, please hire someone to make
the delivery. I’m willing to pay them a little bit, as I’m positive
you are also. You should have no trouble finding my address.

I’ll be waiting to hear from you. This is coming at a good time for
me, as I’m a little short on cash right now. Christmas coming up and
all…you understand.

___________________________________________________________________

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By Shirley Buxton

Still full of life and ready to be on the move, Shirley at 81 years old feels blessed to have lots of energy and to be full of optimism. She was married to Jerry for 64 years, and grieves yet at his death in August of 2019. They have 4 children, 13 grandchildren and 11 great-grandchildren...all beautiful and highly intelligent--of course. :)

33 replies on “To Share The Millions”

How funny you are Shirley – any chance of xome fo those millions coming over to Australia? Or have you spent most and given the rest to stimulate the economy?

Greg, you need to be on the lookout for this opportunity, for suddenly, after my response to their generous offers, my benefactors have become mute. Perhaps they are indeed turning their attention to Australia. Maybe you could even contact them and say you are willing to let them plunk those worrisome millions into one of your accounts. Remember me, though, if you collect. A finders fee is surely appropriate, wouldn’t you say. πŸ™‚

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Wonder what would happen if you just pulled up over there and said you were there to pick it up ?! Hey, I’ll even go with you !!!!

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Okay, Penny, I’ll let you know. Funny thing, “they” seemed to eager to give me that money, but when I asked them to just bring over the cash, I haven’t heard another word. Strange, huh?

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Our bags are packed !!! Until then, we’ll just keep lurking about here. “Rete,” loves looking at all your pictures, keeps her up to date on the family. So, keep writing, and taking those beautiful pictures !!!!!!!!!!

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Hey, Penny.

What a treat to hear from you. Jerry told me a couple of days ago that you have been lurking around here. Thank you for reading and for commenting.

Can’t think of a better way to spend the money I’m about to receive than what you have suggested. I’ll let you know when it arrives, and we’ll look forward to having you come–Rete in tow. πŸ™‚

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Well Sis. Shirley, I guess that your nephew, Whit, and I could use some of those millions to put Maw Wyatt in the back seat and move up there and help you and Bro. Gerald with that wonderful church !!!!

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Oh! Thank you for sharing, Sis. Buxton! You’re so generous. πŸ˜€

I would like to buy our church building so we will have no more payments on it. Then, I’d like to fix up the other side of the building, that we aren’t using right now, for our youth group, REFUGE. They need their own place to have church. Then, I’d like to buy drums and upgrade our sound system; and buy all the singers cordless microphones. Then, I’d like to have our Sunday School bus painted. Whew!
That’s for starters. I’ll have more later if there is enough money left.

I just had a thought. God could be reading this blog and seeing what His children are desiring. It would not be too hard for Him to give all these desires to us. πŸ˜€

Love ya!

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Yes! Yes! Yes! My prayers have been answered. Now I will finally have enough money to support all of our foreign missionaries and build them churches and Bible Schools in their country. And also have enough to get home missionaries into every city, town and hamlet right here in America. Then I will be able to build my father-in-law and mother-in-law and nice home that they can live in for free. And have plenty to keep reaching out to the lost and hurting right here at home. Wow! This is incredible.
Oh yes, I would really like to have a nice big Christmas this year for my family too. That would be so fun watching their faces as I handed them their gifts.
It’s fun to dream.

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Oh, Mervin, thank you. If they express any difficulty with finding our place, I definitely will refer them to you…way up there in the San Joaquin! The delivery charges shouldn’t be a problem, as we’re talking big money here. Don’t hesitate to submit a hefty bill.

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Sis. Buxton:
No need to have the “cash” delivered tyo your home. It may be to far out of the way for them. Just have them contact myself and would be very happy to both pick it up and deliver it to you for them.

Oh, yes, first we would need to come to a fair and just charge for my services as just a poor humble deliver person.

Mervin

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Well, if you dream long enough, your dream will come true, that’s what they say. So here we go. I’d like a really big house for all the girls I love that need a Mom and a big Sister. It has to have enough bathrooms, big bedrooms, a huge kitchen/eating area, a big, big den for bible studies, singing, worship, a awesome yard with room for playing and walking, a large covered porch, outdoor built in BBQ, maybe a pool? We’ll need a bus to go to Sunday School. In fact we could use one right now!
I’d like my own bathroom and office/study/crafts room.
It’s the girls home of my dreams, with gravel paths, and fire places, warm and cozy home, full of God’s love.
Wait a minute, why not make it two or 3 homes!
You’ll have enough money for all that and my new car and a school and a …………………. can I go on ’til it comes?

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Jennifer, I believe you are third on the list, but a new car will be no problem at all. Christmas gifts are definitely appropriate, as are the boots. Glad you will be able to pick up the cash. We can have a nice visit. Be sure and bring the kids.

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Ok. Here goes. I’d like a new car (mine is in the shop) and I saw a cute pair of boots at Nordstrom yesterday. Also, my kids would like some Christmas gifts. I told them they would have to talk to Santa who is apparently named Granny Buxton. I will be ahppy to pick the money up. Thank you.

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Dear Sister Buxton,

While the distinguished gentleman swings by your place, will ask him if he recalls if his cousin’s uncle’s half-sister’s aunt is my 3rd cousin-twice-removed’s, uncle’s brother’s sister?

Thanks.

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Anonymous–Welcome to my blog. Hope you come often.

I believe you’re right that this is a scam. That’s exactly why I’m asking for the cash to be delivered to my home. πŸ™‚

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JANA, I told you not to worry about the size of your dreams. I have had so many notifications there’s no way we’ll ever spend it all. As soon as I have the cash in hand, I’ll bank it, and the interest will keep us rolling for a long time. You’re number 1 on the list.

JOHN, I feel your conscience talking to you. Of course, you should cash in and share the wealth.

ANNA, a shopping trip is a perfectly legitimate destination for such spending as is called for. We’ll go to South Coast Plaza.

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Well, I guess I’m the selfish one in the bunch. I would just like to have my debts paid off and my mortgage too. Then, maybe a new truck for Papa and new car for me. Then, enough to move us back to good ol’ California to be near our beloved 12 grandchildren. I prefer to built my own house. Oh, and I would like to buy a new house for my Shawna and Andrew. Then, have enough in the bank to see us through the rest of our time here on earth. After that, who cares? I love the things you come us with Sis. Buxton.

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You’re sharp Sis. Buxton. πŸ™‚ I get so many of these notices that I am simply amazed at the number of people in this world to whom I am related and feel quite honored to be singled out (or so I thought) by these generous benafactors.

As you said, it is almost Christmas time. Please let me know when your check comes in the mail, so I can come visit. I feel a shopping trip coming on….;)

Love ya.

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Well, let’s start spending! Now I would dream of building a new church that is built in an old world European style (think Notre Dame) with all modern technology. On the opposite corner of the property, I would like to build a youth facility designed similar to the big theatres that have neon lights around them. This building would have a chapel, gym, and education wing. On the back side of the property, I would like to build a two story hotel/apartment complex that has a central entrance for senior citizens. I would have two – four couples live there and share the duties of maintenance, preparing breakfast and a late lunch for all the seniors, and organize activities. The hotel/apartments would have a very low rent and be available to the seniors of our congregation. Once that was all completed, I would probably build a new home.

Since you wish to share this fortune with all your blogger friends and my idea just spent it all, I guess I will resume to dreaming and simply wish for a gold concert pedal harp so you can further share the wealth.

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Hi, Lynda-

Whoops, I forgot that one was top secret! I hope my posting didn’t hinder any money being delivered. Do you want any of my fortune? Any worthy projects in mind?

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