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Absolutely the World’s Worst Mac and Cheese

Historically, Jerry has not liked macaroni and cheese, but I do, and Andrew does, so when Andrew was still at home and Jerry would be off speaking or at a meeting or something, Andrew and I would have the special treat of Kraft Dinner macaroni and cheese. We both loved it, and I know it’s not authentic macaroni and cheese but it’s quite good, especially if you sprinkle lots of black pepper on it. So I would whip up a box of the stuff, and Andrew and I would eat the whole thing!

In recent times, I taught myself to make authentic macaroni and cheese, and over the years, Jerry has even softened to the point where, yes, occasionally, we could have such a dish for dinner. From “scratch,” I’ve made the dish three or four times.

I had chunks of fine cheese left from my big Christmas party, so when I took perishables from the fridge in Crestline, I included the cheese and brought it here to Arizona in the motor home. “We’re having macaroni and cheese for dinner, tomorrow,” I let Jerry know on Monday. He was gracious and said he had learned to like it a little better and that would be fine.

I cooked it yesterday, and it was the worse dinner I ever prepared in my whole life; the macaroni and cheese was not fit to eat. But we struggled through the meal, as church would be starting in an hour and a half and I didn’t have time to prepare anything else. It was awful. When I removed the dish from the oven, it looked beautiful, crusty and brown on the top, but right away I saw that it threatened to be dry—very dry—so that I decided to intervene. I pulled back the edges and poured in milk, thinking that if I stuffed the casserole dish back into the oven for a few minutes, the milk would be absorbed. Not!

When I spooned the food onto our plates, what appeared were dry blobs of macaroni with white milk flowing all over the place, and when I tucked the first bite into my mouth, I knew I had a winner—the world’s worst macaroni and cheese. It was dry, sweet, not salted enough, and it was dripping with 2% milk. We both salted, peppered and Tabascoed the mess on our plates, and Jerry even ate seconds, (I think he was starving) although, I duly noted his usual compliments on my cooking to be distinctly missing. I ate only a few bites, and when I couldn’t abide another morsel, scraped clean my plate into the trash.

I’m not sure what went wrong. I placed raw elbow macaroni in a shallow casserole dish, sprinkled a bit of salt over (I was afraid to put too much for fear the cheese would make it too salty), added the cheese I had grated which was a little parmesan, but mostly Jarlsberg, poured in milk to cover, then sprinkled on a topping of crushed crackers mixed with melted butter. WARNING: DON’T USE THIS RECIPE. I’m telling you now; it’s the world’s worst macaroni and cheese.

You cooks out there, help me here. What was the problem? I’m thinking maybe it was the wrong kind of cheese (I usually use cheddar, but I didn’t have any, and besides I needed to get rid of the Jarlsberg.) The cheese is not bad—tastes really good, so it’s not a matter of spoiled cheese, I know that. What in the world happened?

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My daily devotional is here.

 

 

 

By Shirley Buxton

Still full of life and ready to be on the move, Shirley at 81 years old feels blessed to have lots of energy and to be full of optimism. She was married to Jerry for 64 years, and grieves yet at his death in August of 2019. They have 4 children, 13 grandchildren and 11 great-grandchildren...all beautiful and highly intelligent--of course. :)

8 replies on “Absolutely the World’s Worst Mac and Cheese”

I ALWAYS cook the mac first, and I have used Jarlesberg before. I make a roux, flour butter, a little milk and when it thickens, I add the cheese grated, but…… I never use just one cheese. I always add a little of something else (even if it’s just a little fresh parmesan)… I have no scientific basis for this other than that’s how I’ve always done it.

Hope that helps!

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ROFL! as a connaisseur of mac and cheese, I am very picky. I love kraft shells and cheese. I also like to make homemade with velveeta cheese and some milk in the micro.

I have never been big on baked. However my wife has been experimenting with the oven on this and I have been fairly impressed.

Best meal of the week? Fishsticks and mac and cheese. Oh yeah!

You do gotta cook it first though.

Jerry is a great guy!

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Awwww. You poor thing!

– I definately would have cooked the mac.

– Usually the “better” the cheese, the worse the mac-n-cheese. We use two jars of Olde English cheese and 1 jar of regular cheese whiz.

– “when I couldn’t abide another morsel” In 14 years of marriage, I have only made two such dinners. Now mind you, I haven’t made all winners, but there were only two that I just couldn’t abide.

1 was called “Pasta Verde`”… which sounds great. As a blushing bride of 20 who’d always lived with Mom and Dad, I had no idea that the recipe on the back of the can of peas wasn’t PESTO. Afterall, it had 1/4 cup of parsley in it. And mushed peas. As my twin sis has reminded me for the past 14 years, “sometimes, Jayleigh, mushed peas are JUST mushed peas.”

2 was about 5 years ago and I didn’t yet know that I HATE the taste of cilantro – it tastes to me like Palmolive dish soap – and I’d made some dish with pasta and black-eyed peas and cilantro. I also didn’t know that to me, Black-eyed Peas taste like dirt. So I had a nice dish of Palmolive and Dirt over pasta. Deeelish!

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Well, I can only say that I would have cooked the Mac first, and used Cheddar. But, what do I know. You refered to the word “scratch”. You ever hear about the young bride who looked all over in the grocery looking for “scratch”? She said that her mother always said that she cooked from scratch. The thing is, I am a good cook also but I have found that there are so many good “already prepared” short cuts now adays. Nothing like it used to be. So, I cut corners when ever I can. Some things just can’t replace “scratch” though. Love you

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LOL!!! Reminds me of my “famous” ginger pork chop dinner. Only mine was so bad that Nathan and I took one bite, spit it out and went to McDonalds. I don’t have the foggiest idea of what could have went wrong with your mac and cheese except probably the cheese. Better luck next time.

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